AM I OLD YET? Some notes
July 2010
When do we become and
“old man”, or an “old woman”? Does the transformation take place at a certain
age? Are there criteria that we can use to make that call, and if so, what are
they: physical appearance, functional status, mental acuity, attitude and
personal outlook?
The old man I see so
clearly in my mind wears a wrinkled face topped with thin unruly hair,
including wisps in his ears and nose. His back is slightly bent and his gait
slow but certain. His trousers are baggy and his flannel shirt is encased in a
loose cardigan sweater. Although his hearing is impaired, his vision is
adequate with glasses, and his appetite for companionship, conversation, and
good food and wine is undiminished. As a young boy this description fit my
grandfather in his mid 70s when he lost his eyesight due to complications from
diabetes. One of my jobs was to take my grandfather on a daily walk when
weather permitted. He held my hand in one hand and his white cane in the other,
and together we walked the quarter mile to the highway and back. I remember my
grandfather as an old man.
The years passed, and I
watched my parents grow old. Sadly my mother died at the age of 76, never
reaching the status of an “old lady” in my eyes. My father died at the age of
82, about a year after suffering a stroke that left him partially disabled. In
spite of that he was never the old man I saw in his father. And as I’m writing
this, it occurs to me that the difference between my perception of my
grandfather and my parents is not due to anything on their part, but is a
reflection of my own age.
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